Problogger’s amazing social media love-in continues to drive newTwitter followers to my account (over 80 so far) and I’ve checked out the Twitter page of every single one. I found and followed some clever, interesting and funny people but there were also some really freaky and/or annoying ones that didn’t get followed.

Here’s a few tips to help you evaluate your Twitter page and make sure you don’t give the wrong impression.

By the way, if I didn’t follow you back, it doesn’t necessarily mean that I think you’re weird but you might want to read on and check anyway. All names have been changed to minimise offence to fragile egos.

The Gurus And Experts

If your username suggests that you are a design guru, why does your Twitter page have orange writing on a red background? You must have tweaked your settings to make it that way, if trichromacy is to blame then I have sympathy but you should know to be careful when choosing colours.

Does your little bio say that you marketing expert or social media guru? You might want to post a little bit more than just the titles of your latest blog posts. Social media is a conversation, try having one - most people on Twitter aren’t that scary.

The Needlesharp Niches And The Me Too Experts

So your blog niche is one-armed, Mongolian crochet knitters? That’s nice, but if you want an English geek to follow you, you need to get out of your niche for a while and add some personal colour. Twitter is interactive but we need some common ground to get the conversation started.

As for the “Me Too Experts” we all want to make millions whilst messing around on this internet thing but it takes more than just declaring yourself to be a wealth consultant or blogging facilitator. There are many people out there who make a successful living from blogging and social media and they don’t bother with fancy titles, they get out here and interact, work hard and share their knowledge.

The Newbies

I have quite a lot of sympathy here, we were all new to Twitter once and I did end up following quite a few people with only three of four tweets to their name.

Those first few tweets are very important - forget Twitter’s question of “What are you doing right now?” and introduce yourself, ask a few questions, dive in (the water’s lovely).

Avatars

I can understand newbies having the standard o_0 avatar, but a nice, easily recognised avatar is important in social media. My avatar is a grainy cell-phone picture but it can be seen all over the net and I think I look OK in the picture (I’m pretty ugly in real life though).

Oh man, some of you people are ugly don’t photograph well. If that’s the case use a cartoon style, or crop some stock photography. Two great examples of avatars are shown below, instantly recognisable and very cool-looking. Maybe Sebastian and Kristen are hideous in real life (though I doubt it) but their avatars show that everyone can be good looking on the internet.

Gender Confusion

While I’m on the subject of avatars, who knew there were so many amazing looking women on Twitter? And they all work in social media marketing too!

That one tweet along the lines of “Woot! Superbowl Saturday! Me an my bros are gonna get trashed. Wooha!” is gives you away as a liar.

Guys, if you’re going to pretend to be a woman to get attention then you can’t let the persona drop for a minute. You’ve got to lead the double life so completely that even you start believing it, which is going to leave you with some hefty therapy bills.

If English Is Your First Language Let It Show

I was lucky enough to get followed by people from all over the world with a vast array of first languages and I’m amazed at how well they can grasp the complexities of English and manage to be interesting in just 140 characters.

I’m also amazed at just how badly people from the UK & North America can mangle the mother tongue. Mr Text-Speak Dude, I’m looking at you “LOL, GTFO kthxbai!!1!”

So, a bit of a rant about some of the characters on Twitter. It’s meant in a fairly light-hearted manner and I’m not exactly perfect myself so don’t take it personally, even if you are an internet weirdo. If you found this rude or condescending then sorry, reading through a hundred Twitter pages can do that to a chap and maybe you would find Problogger’s hints more palatable, he’s too nice to call people weird.

Creative Commons licensed photos by Amanda Benham & Mr. Wright.